to XANGA

I'll drop by to read everyone else's entries still.

Maybe I'll write here again, even.

For now, Happy New Year!

I don't feel like doing it anymore.
I don't even feel like trying.
I simply have nothing left to say.

Goodbye.

After some convincing from kalystakruz , missachickabee, and alienzapper, i tried some beer ( which i hate, because i was, up to that point, convinced, it tasted like piss ), and it really wasn't that bad. I had some Corona, and Hoegarden, and they didn't taste as bad as I imagined.

But honestly, I don't think I actually associate alcohol with piss. It's my silly excuse to get out of drinking alcohol, mostly. I'm not sure what I associate alcohol with, but it's nothing good. People get into accidents, lose composure, become complete retards, say the wrong things, puke, ... I've seen it all happen.... but I guess a little won't kill. But you know what association does to you psychologically? It affects your taste buds. Works for me, at least.

Anyway, it was a good night.

missy lambie, you should just skip school and stay here, and we can live in poverty together, until i start winning the lottery so we can live happily ever after... *laughs*

So anyway, a little later into the night, my baby, Sam and our mutual friend, Paul came down, and the rest of them headed to watch Troy, but I stayed with Sam and Paul. We headed to Brekos and the boys bought me my first bottle, which was... good.

I'm beginning to associate beer/alcohol with better things now, thank you, boys and girls!

I feel like ranting a little about how silly the voters on American Idol are to given Latoya London the boot from the reality tv show. If Jasmine Trias wins this contest, it just goes to show how tasteless the Americans are with music, or should i say, Hawaii? She had better not win.

Let me digress a little about Jasmine. She cried even before she got voted off. This is harsh, but hey, whosesympathy vote is she trying to garner? She should have just done better instead, so she wouldn't have to stand there and cry. Guess she knew it was easier to cry than to sing better huh?

Back to the point. Or maybe it's not complacency that led them to put Latoya and Fantasia on the bottom two. Perhaps, it was just a reflection of how the society is: racist and elitist. Either way, there's no wrong in labelling them "stupid white men" now. They've earned it, to be called such.

Fools.

To a friend

Dear David,

i'm sorry.
it's all i can manage now.
there will be the rain of teardrops on cold endless nights,
and it really does get harder to breathe,
but remember the shoulders you can lean on,
remember the numbers to call,
remember the friends you can count on,



…… and slowly, you'll see the sun again
the rainbow never appears before the storm..
always after.

a friend,
esther.







No More

Mrs Caroline Lee was my former vice-principal.

In her 2 years in Nanyang Girls' High School, I was a student there, and even though it was only 24 months of interaction, I remember her fondly.

The most vivid memory I had of Mrs Caronline Lee was her and me chatting by the hallway, near the staircase that led up to my classroom. I even remembered her in her Ferragamo pumps, and me in my red Esprit bag, and she stopped to asked how I was doing when I greeted her. We had a conversation. I bitched about remedial classes and the approaching exams, and she listened to me, intently. Later, she offered some advice, and then headed back to her office.

Every now and then, whenever we ran into each other, she would offer a smile, and sometimes, a word of encouragement as well, and it was always pleasant. By the way, I wasn't a brilliant student in NYGH, but Mrs Lee, along with every other teacher who believed in me, made it a lot easier to live with not being brainy enough. But then again, half of us weren't brilliant in comparison to the Asean scholors.

You know when you have someone good in your life, because however short the time they were in yours, they make a difference. Mrs Lee believed in me, and because of that, she inspired me.



And for all her contributions in being an educator, and nurturer, she will always be remembered.